Who Says Girls Don’t Wank?

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It always makes me laugh when I make a reference to wanking on Twitter and someone tells me girls can’t wank. Well someone needs to tell my clit that. I’ve been getting myself off long before I understood the mechanics of what I was doing. There has been a long-held perception that whilst masturbation is a rite of passage for boys it’s something to be hidden or ashamed of in girls.

Whilst parents of teenage boys will even joke about crusty tissues under the bed or the traditional wank sock. How often is masturbation discussed with reference to teenage girls? I had male friends as a teenager who would have porn openly in their bedrooms and be blatant about their wanking in front of their parents. I know for sure my parents would have been mortified if they’d found my first vibrator in my bedroom at the tender age of 17 or all the porn hidden in my wardrobe.  Recently my friend found links to mild porn sites on her 13-year-old sons iPad. Her attitude was “boys will be boys” I asked her how she would have reacted had it been one of her two daughters and she visibly cringed. It struck me as strange that when her 14-year-old daughter found her vibrator in her room whilst raiding it she had made up a total fabrication about it being a kegel exercise device instead of telling the truth. Why is that such a difficult conversation to have with a daughter but “just one of those things” with a son?

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It’s even stranger given that there is a multi million pound industry selling sex toys that are primarily aimed at women. There are definitely huge strides being made in sex toys for men but it’s fair to say there’s nowhere near the choice available, especially if it’s a man who isn’t into anal play. Dildos have been around for centuries so clearly women have been wanking as long as men. It’s a natural part of self discovery and a vital part of an enjoyable sex life. How can someone else be expected to make you cum if you don’t know how to do it yourself?

Modern female sex toys have changed and evolved into some seriously amazing technology. The advent of the Rabbit harked a reawakening amongst women of the benefits of owning a vibrator. The rabbit even made an appearance in an infamous episode of Sex and the City such was it’s integration into everyday life and there are a million different variants of that original design now. Then there was the Wand. Starting out life as the Hitachi Body Wand, a powerful massager, women quickly cottoned on to the dual purpose ability of this device, to the point where Hitachi dropped their name from the product in an effort to escape the association. The Hitachi was a regular star in porn, particularly BDSM porn due to its ability to “force” orgasms. Now the UK has its very own version of the Hitachi wand in The Doxy. The Doxy is an absolute revelation. It’s true that some men enjoy using wands during play but they’re mainly marketed towards women.

Recently advances have been made into areas such as “touch-free orgasms” with toys like The Womanizer W100/W500 and The Satisfyer Pro 2 offering air pulse stimulation to create a sucking sensation on the clit. This sort of toy is making huge waves in the market at the minute. There are also electro stimulation toys such as the MyStim range which deliver slight electric pulses during play.

The top of the pile of sex toys for girls are the fucking machines. Literally as it says on the label a machine built purely to fuck you with a host of attachments. Sporting a hefty price tag these are surely the pinnacle of wanking toys. Recently there have been smaller hand-held “personal fucking machines” such as the recently launched Mia Maxx. It’s true that most of these toys could be utilised by men but unless they are into anal penetration it’s unlikely.

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So given the massive scale of choice available to the wanking female why is there still such a huge degree of awkwardness about the subject? I can only think that this is down to society and the thin layer of sexism which still covers certain areas of life. It’s not very lady-like to spend the afternoon with your hand in your knickers is it? It ruffles feathers to think of “the fairer sex” spread across their beds, naked, in the throes of self-induced, sheet grabbing climax. What an absolute crock of shit. An orgasm is the best feeling on earth! A better question is why wouldn’t we? I think it’s also partially down to the fear of admitting women love sex and actively seek out sexual satisfaction. We enjoy it just as much as our male counterparts, maybe society needs to start paying attention to this and knocking the Victorian values on the head.

Without doubt this is a generational divide. I know my mum owned a sex toy but she would rather have pulled her own teeth out than admit that to me or my sister. I’ve tried to adopt a more honest approach to masturbation with my girls. My eldest daughter recently asked me if I owned a vibrator. Although I was initially stunned at the question coming out of the blue, I admitted I did and we had a discussion about why I did and why this wasn’t unusual or anything to be ashamed of. I’m very open about sex and I truly hope my daughters grow up and don’t feel the repression I felt as a teenager. The fear of being caught meeting urges that are just part of life scarred my teenage years and I couldn’t wait to fly the parental nest for some privacy.

It’s time that society started accepting girls cum, hard and often. We are built for it! Even more so in fact than men. We have an organ, in the clitoris which has absolutely no function other than to give us sexual pleasure and bring about orgasm. Two if you count the G Spot. Not to mention the fact that we recover faster and can multiple orgasm over and over. When I’m playing with a toy or even just touching myself I feel cheated with anything less than three orgasms, if I’ve set time aside purely to wank then I’ll be looking at five plus. With this in mind I’m offended by the notion girls don’t wank, I’m a girl and I’m basically a wank ninja.

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